Removing the unnecessary...

So here we are moving...again! Since moving to Florida in 1999, I think we have moved six times!!! When you become a renter, it seems there is always a better deal or more space for the money and so you just move. I must admit it becomes a little annoying sometimes packing up all your stuff, and lugging it across town. One thing I learn better every time I move though, is how much more loosely I want to hold onto the things of this world. This time in particular, after being on several mission trips these past two years, I have thrown out more items than ever before! There are so many useless belongings and it makes me sick to think of the wasted money that could have been better used doing more of the Lord's work. You really can never give more than is needed! Clutter, clutter...it's everywhere! As I think of all the material possessions that take up too much space or waste my time...so it is with my heart. Many idle thoughts or vain meditations. How often can one possibly think about herself? Obviously too often! I have been talking to my 4th grade girls at school about their speech and behavior, in an effort to train them in godly (young) womanhood. We started memorizing this little chant: "Before you speak: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?" It breaks my heart to think of how often I fail as an adult woman to think on these things before I speak or act. I would say much less if I remembered these things before I speak. This is the woman I would like to be: "She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" (Proverbs 31:26)

Every spiritual blessing...

It has been a rough week, for so many reasons, and I know it has been for many people. It seems that we are under siege, and that Satan is trying his hardest right now to bind up our minds away from Christ and His finished work on the cross. Many heartaches and struggles are going on all around me...death, families being torn apart, sickness, rebellion. It is the complete fulfillment of God's Holy Word! He said, "In this life you will have many troubles" and we believe every word of God is wholly true. So why do we question Him when He shows us that?

I got bit by something almost two weeks ago now, and it has slowly taken over my whole body, yet only the red spot on my toe has been visible. Yesterday I went to the hospital after several unsuccessful visits to a clinic, and finally got some much-needed treatment. The funny thing is...the first doctor I saw prescribed an antibiotic, but when I went to the ER, the doctore there wanted to cut open my toe and drain the posion from my body. What an amazing picture of SIN!!! It may look only like a red bump, but it has quickly infected the entire body, without my being able to even see it! And I can soothe it a little with some medicine, but in truth, only cutting it out completely will remove it and kill the bacteria running through my blood! When this reality hit me, I felt like such an idiot, I have heard truths like this before but what a merciful God to allow me to experience it so personally and harshly! I remember Pastor Tommy teaching about how Agag was hacked to pieces in the Old Testament and how that is what we must do to our sin...this is the same type of picture. There is so much sin all around me, within me...the only hope is to kill this poison.

While I have been lying in bed each night in much pain, my Mom has been reading to me from Ephesians. It has been so sweet, as the Lord quickly reminded me that regardless of anything else I have or don't have, He has "blessed me with every spiritual blessing in Christ Jesus". These spiritual blessings are more than enough for me, and could sustain me in all circumstances. What a gracious God! I am relying on those promises right now, as I am still healing slowly. Just like sin, the effect takes time. I am not immediately healed overnight, but I must now follow the doctor's orders, finish all my medications, and really take care of myself so that it will heal entirely. Sin must be monitored...checked and rechecked. I pray that the Lord will continue to check my heart and purge the sin from it!

Labor Day

As I contemplated all that I wanted to do on this wonderful extra day off, many thoughts flooded my mind...pack up my room since we are moving in just a couple weeks, grade my student's papers, cook a fancy meal, clean my bathroom, run errands, read, and the list could go on and on. It seems there is never a shortage of things to do, and yet I am often struggling to know where to even begin. The task becomes overwhelming if not approached with that old adage, "do one thing at a time and eventually you will get there". I don't even know if that really is the old adage, but it seems like people are always telling you to try that approach! It really is true though. I am already seeing the end of this day and know that much has gone by the wayside. I did manage to run an errand, reorganize my entire closet, finish laundry, do some correspondence, and cook a little. But at least I was able to accomplish those things, and the rest will simply have to come little by little. Now, on to the good stuff. In the midst of checking my emails, I came across this quote from a blog I frequently read. It really stood out to me after the powerful message that we heard in Sunday worship this weekend. My pastor was so clear in expositing the text from I Corinthians 9 and 10. People were greatly convicted, including myself, of the utter depravity of the human heart. I am enslaved to sins, and without a right understanding of the demands of my Lord, I will not be freed from bondage and will continue in habitual wickedness. We get so caught up in classifying our sins too, thinking that a personal sin is so much less evil than some horrible atrocity that we hear about on the news: FALSE! Humility is not optional for the believer and it is by humility that I will recognize my own deceitful heart for what it is, turn to Christ, and throw off the chains of sin. Meditate on this:

Blessed are the Poor in Spirit"by Thomas Watson
"He that is poor in spirit is lowly in heart. Rich men are commonly proud and scornful, but the poor are submissive. The poor in spirit roll themselves in the dust in the sense of their unworthiness. 'I abhor myself in dust' (Job 42:6). He that is poor in spirit looks at another's excellencies and his own infirmities. He denies not only his sins but his duties.The more grace he has, the more humble he is, because he now sees himself a greater debtor to God. If he can do any duty, he acknowledges it is Christ's strength more than his own. As the ship gets to the haven more by the benefit of the wind than the sail, so when a Christian makes swift progress, it is more by wind of God's Spirit than the sail of his own endeavour. The poor in spirit, when he acts most like a saint, confesses himself to be 'the chief of sinners'. He blushes more at the defect of his graces than others do at the excess of their sins. He dares not say he has prayed or wept. He lives, yet not he, but Christ lives in him. He labours, yet not he, but the grace of God."

I pray that I can learn to see "another's excellencies" and my "own infirmities", considering others better than myself and acknowledging the abundant life-giving grace of God.