Learning a lot!!!

As I began my graduate school courses this week, I am already just overwhelmed with gratitude at the truth that is being expounded here. This morning we spent a good portion of time discussing counseling as related to parenting. While I am not a parent, many of my friends are, and with my previous teaching positions, I think this information is highly beneficial for either situation. I have not really spent time yet organizing these thoughts, so for right now I hope these bulleted points are an encouragement to some. They are taken from the course, Problems & Procedures (taught by Dr. John Street at The Master’s College in Santa Clarita, CA):

> An inattentive mind is often a lazy mind, which is actually selfishness! Call sin what it is in a child. It is not an inability to focus or keep attention, but a selfish heart!
> Use biblical terms when speaking with your child about their disobedience. The word "naughty" is not found anywhere in Scripture - if you want your child to think biblically about life, then you must teach them biblical language. The word "naughty" is primarily defined in the dictionary as "mischevious". This doesn't give a child an accurate picture of their sinfulness. It relates it to just one behavior, instead of revealing the entire picture of their heart, which is depraved and sinful in thought and deed. A child is not frustrated, they are not throwing a temper tantrum - they are angry! Anger is addressed consistently in the Bible, so by calling it by its true name, a parent can then teach the child that anger is a sin and what is to replace it - goodness and kindness.
> Failure to listen is selfishness and refusal to give honor (Rom. 12:10; Prv. 19:20, 27).
> The issue in child correction is not a lack of discipline, but a lack of dealing with the heart motives and intentions behind the sinful behavior. Even spanking can be akin to behavior therapy because without addressing the heart, you are merely training the child to be a Pharisee. There are twelve proverbs dealing with the heart before it even mentions the rod.
> It is absolutely essential to use the rod in disciplining a child, particularly in their youngest years; you will most certainly lose the battle if you don’t start out right. Furthermore, it is important to use a “rod” and not your hand when spanking; otherwise your hand becomes an instrument associated with punishment. Always take time to reevaluate your method of discipline. Using a paint stick or spoon on a young child can be helpful, but as the child moves through the toddler years, this will certainly not be as effective, particularly if you are only spanking the child lightly and leaving their diaper on, which provides a great deal of “padding”. A child is not going to tell you that it does not hurt any longer, in their deceptive hearts, they will desire to keep it the way it is and as easy as possible.
> Don’t treat every child the same. Some children may require a great deal more amount of time and attention, causing you to have to make choices and sacrifices to maintain their discipline and growth.
> Be intentional about having a plan for how others, including grandparents and family friends, can participate in the discipline and education of your child. It is imperative that your child knows that the righteousness you are trying to cultivate in him or her is going to be reinforced by those you entrust them to for care.

I hope to share more in the days to come!