Every spiritual blessing...

It has been a rough week, for so many reasons, and I know it has been for many people. It seems that we are under siege, and that Satan is trying his hardest right now to bind up our minds away from Christ and His finished work on the cross. Many heartaches and struggles are going on all around me...death, families being torn apart, sickness, rebellion. It is the complete fulfillment of God's Holy Word! He said, "In this life you will have many troubles" and we believe every word of God is wholly true. So why do we question Him when He shows us that?

I got bit by something almost two weeks ago now, and it has slowly taken over my whole body, yet only the red spot on my toe has been visible. Yesterday I went to the hospital after several unsuccessful visits to a clinic, and finally got some much-needed treatment. The funny thing is...the first doctor I saw prescribed an antibiotic, but when I went to the ER, the doctore there wanted to cut open my toe and drain the posion from my body. What an amazing picture of SIN!!! It may look only like a red bump, but it has quickly infected the entire body, without my being able to even see it! And I can soothe it a little with some medicine, but in truth, only cutting it out completely will remove it and kill the bacteria running through my blood! When this reality hit me, I felt like such an idiot, I have heard truths like this before but what a merciful God to allow me to experience it so personally and harshly! I remember Pastor Tommy teaching about how Agag was hacked to pieces in the Old Testament and how that is what we must do to our sin...this is the same type of picture. There is so much sin all around me, within me...the only hope is to kill this poison.

While I have been lying in bed each night in much pain, my Mom has been reading to me from Ephesians. It has been so sweet, as the Lord quickly reminded me that regardless of anything else I have or don't have, He has "blessed me with every spiritual blessing in Christ Jesus". These spiritual blessings are more than enough for me, and could sustain me in all circumstances. What a gracious God! I am relying on those promises right now, as I am still healing slowly. Just like sin, the effect takes time. I am not immediately healed overnight, but I must now follow the doctor's orders, finish all my medications, and really take care of myself so that it will heal entirely. Sin must be monitored...checked and rechecked. I pray that the Lord will continue to check my heart and purge the sin from it!

Labor Day

As I contemplated all that I wanted to do on this wonderful extra day off, many thoughts flooded my mind...pack up my room since we are moving in just a couple weeks, grade my student's papers, cook a fancy meal, clean my bathroom, run errands, read, and the list could go on and on. It seems there is never a shortage of things to do, and yet I am often struggling to know where to even begin. The task becomes overwhelming if not approached with that old adage, "do one thing at a time and eventually you will get there". I don't even know if that really is the old adage, but it seems like people are always telling you to try that approach! It really is true though. I am already seeing the end of this day and know that much has gone by the wayside. I did manage to run an errand, reorganize my entire closet, finish laundry, do some correspondence, and cook a little. But at least I was able to accomplish those things, and the rest will simply have to come little by little. Now, on to the good stuff. In the midst of checking my emails, I came across this quote from a blog I frequently read. It really stood out to me after the powerful message that we heard in Sunday worship this weekend. My pastor was so clear in expositing the text from I Corinthians 9 and 10. People were greatly convicted, including myself, of the utter depravity of the human heart. I am enslaved to sins, and without a right understanding of the demands of my Lord, I will not be freed from bondage and will continue in habitual wickedness. We get so caught up in classifying our sins too, thinking that a personal sin is so much less evil than some horrible atrocity that we hear about on the news: FALSE! Humility is not optional for the believer and it is by humility that I will recognize my own deceitful heart for what it is, turn to Christ, and throw off the chains of sin. Meditate on this:

Blessed are the Poor in Spirit"by Thomas Watson
"He that is poor in spirit is lowly in heart. Rich men are commonly proud and scornful, but the poor are submissive. The poor in spirit roll themselves in the dust in the sense of their unworthiness. 'I abhor myself in dust' (Job 42:6). He that is poor in spirit looks at another's excellencies and his own infirmities. He denies not only his sins but his duties.The more grace he has, the more humble he is, because he now sees himself a greater debtor to God. If he can do any duty, he acknowledges it is Christ's strength more than his own. As the ship gets to the haven more by the benefit of the wind than the sail, so when a Christian makes swift progress, it is more by wind of God's Spirit than the sail of his own endeavour. The poor in spirit, when he acts most like a saint, confesses himself to be 'the chief of sinners'. He blushes more at the defect of his graces than others do at the excess of their sins. He dares not say he has prayed or wept. He lives, yet not he, but Christ lives in him. He labours, yet not he, but the grace of God."

I pray that I can learn to see "another's excellencies" and my "own infirmities", considering others better than myself and acknowledging the abundant life-giving grace of God.

Prayer

I have not been faithful in writing these past two weeks, but things have been really busy here. School has begun and I have ushered in 21 new little faces to my classroom. It has been a deeply challenging and yet sweetly pleasant few days as I seek to know my students and begin training them in their education. Some days I feel as though I spend the majority of my day dealing with discipline issues, character development and their personal crises. But the Lord has continued to remind me of the usefulness of being consistent and pressing on in those matters. These young hearts are sitting under my authority seven hours out of every day and I am now responsible for the outcome of their souls, which is of far greater importance than their intellectual education. If it were not for many distinct people the Lord placed in my life to teach me and mold me, I would not have been saved and sanctified at such a young age. I pray that for my kids, that they would see Christ in me daily, that I would actively live out my faith in a pure and undefiled manner. I have been reading a book on prayer by Charles Spurgeon for my quiet time, as I want to experience growth in this discipline. Prayer has been a struggle for me often, as I begin with good intentions and quickly become distracted by my own selfish desires and meditations. It cannot be said better than Spurgeon: "First, in order for God to make you greatly useful, He must teach you how to pray. The man who is a great preacher and yet cannot pray will come to a bad end. A woman who is noted for her Bible teaching and yet cannot pray will also come to a bad end. If you can be great without prayer, your greatness will be your ruin." Now that is a frightening thought!!! Spurgeon goes on to address our motives in prayer by saying, "If your desires are the longing of fallen nature, if your desires begin and end with your own self, and if the primary purpose for which you live is not to glorify God but to glorify yourself, then you may fight, but you will not have. You may get up early and stay up late, but nothing worth gaining will come of it." When I think of the things I am praying for, I realize how often they are linked to what I want and what I think should happen, without bowing my knee to the good providence of God Almighty! Lord, make me humble and grant me a heart devoted to Your purposes and desires!

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain...

but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. What a "conicidence" that this is the 30th verse of Proverbs 31! I spent my 30th birthday yesterday fellowshipping with two of my best friends, Amber and Patti. My sisters in the Lord are a constant reminder of this verse in Proverbs because although we all struggle inwardly with the remaining pull towards sin, God has used our friendships as a means to conform us to the image of His Son, and in particular to strive to be women who fear the Lord. I can honestly say that I would not fear the Lord as much had He not faithfully used these dear friends to refine me daily. We enjoyed a sweet time out last night, going to a great restaurant where I had my first Shirley Temple(a non-alcoholic beverage:), a chick flick and then ice cream! Baby Elizabeth even joined in, having her very first "Girls Night Out":) Be sure to check out Elizabeth's cooing and smiling on my video link: http://www.youtube.com/affoltermel

Another school year begins...

Well this has been a busy week as all of us teachers begin planning, eager to greet our new students come Monday morning! My classroom continues to evolve as I search for ways to comfortably accommodate 21 students this year. I think back to last year when one of my best friends, Sarah prepared my entire room for me as I was returning from a summer on mission in South Africa AND one of my other best friends, Amber was teaching right across the hall. It is astonishing how much changes in one year! Now Sarah has moved far away to begin life with her husband at seminary and Amber is a stay-at-home mom. Suffice it to say I miss them both tremendously at school. However, God is always abundant in His mercy and blessings, as there are many new teachers to join in sweet fellowship with as our school continues to expand. I am looking forward to this new group of students and their families to minister to as I share how God's sovereign hand is upon all learning.

Waves of change these days...and to top it off I get to reflect on a life of 30 years now that God has granted me. This Saturday is the big one:) I had so many thoughts of what life would be like at this age, and it is overwhelming to think how different it is than what I presumed. Presumption...a horrible thing! We spend so much time thinking of ourselves and what we think is best for us, what will make us the most happy and comfortable. Yet our great God overrules it all! And His ways are far better than our measly plans. No, my life is not what I thought it would be...it is far more wonderful than I could have ever imagined. The Lord has blessed me immeasurably in ways that I may never have first thought of as blessings but He has granted joyful peace and a heart that desires to embrace His perfect will. I thank Him for it!

The real reason I am posting today is to share a couple photos and a video link of my sweet little friends, Daniel and Elizabeth. Amber brought them to eat lunch with me today at school. My room doesn't quite do justice to the way Sarah had it arranged for me last year, but it has been fun nonetheless to get creative. Daniel is walking all over now and Elizabeth is growing quickly. Change again, can't seem to escape it so let us delight in it!

Check out Daniel walking like a big boy:

http://youtube.com/profile?user=affoltermel

What is my adornment?

Part of what encouraged me to make my own blog page was reading some other really wonderful pages from some very godly women. One of the blogs I read at least a couple times per week is "The Purple Cellar" written by Lydia Brownback and Jennifer Redman. Lydia has written a great little book entitled, Fine China is For Single Women Too. When I came across this recent post of hers on the blog, I had to paste it in and share it with my friends. I was cut to the heart when I read this, as I am exactly as she describes - often preoccupied with appearance and "bettering" myself. This is a slicing reminder of Paul's admonishment in I Timothy that "women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness - with good works". As I thought on this passage and read Lydia's post, I was encouraged that we must not focus so much on whether this verse specifically forbids certain types of clothing or accessorizing, but more on the heart motive behind it. And I must humbly confess that my motives are often tainted by a sinful wish for attention and reinforcement that I fit in with modern society. The thing is, I don't want to fit in with modern society, because if that is my standard, then I am in serious trouble! Where is my self-control? Where is my professed godliness and good works? If those are not the things that are first noticed when someone interacts with me, then I am failing to glorify God! I should feel out of place, I am a "resident alien" in this world. On that note, I wanted to share Lydia's post, as I could not possibly say it better than her:
"Narcissism--we're all guilty to one degree or another. It's part of being human. It's part of being American.Our narcissism is exposed in our obsessive thoughts about our weight. Retailers have taken our obsession straight to the bank with today's vanity sizes. Yesterday's 10 is today's 6.It's exposed in the nail salons and the tanning booths that bookend every strip mall in the country.It's exposed in our $150-every-eight-weeks hairstyles.It's exposed in how easily duped we are by the promise of expensive cellulite vanishing cream.Our self-obsession hasn't made us a happier nation over all. Our French tips and all-over tans have done nothing to diminish the number of anti-depressant prescriptions sliding across pharmacy counters everyday. That's because the glances of admiration and envy we get for wearing single-digit sizes provides only a quick and shallow fix.Narcissim is even more prevalent with our claims and possessions: My happiness, my goals, my desires, my rights, my family, my schedule. Me, my, I--it's what we live for. Self involvement breeds more self-involvement because it all just seems so normal. Think about the conversations we have around the water cooler or in the parking lot:"Do you think I've lost weight?""Well, now that you mention it, you do look a bit thinner--not that you needed to lose anything. I'm the one who could stand to take off a couple.""You? Don't be silly. Your still wearing a size 4, aren't you? What's the problem?"Well, actually, I'm a 2 now. But I've only been able to get to the gym three times a week lately, so I've been worried about my weight."Can we imagine holding a conversation like that in front of a missionary from our church who spends fifty weeks a year in tribal India? For that matter, can we imagine walking up to anyone we really respect and admire and asking, "Does this outfit make me look fat?""Of course not!" you protest, "Those conversations are personal and private!"No they're not. They're just stupid.Wouldn't it be glorifying to God, and utterly freeing to us, if we made a pact to help one another recover from our narcissistic tendencies rather than remaining narcissism enablers? Come on . . . we can do it."

Saying Farewell

This past week I said "see you later" to some of the best friends I have ever had. It was a bittersweet moment. God is leading them to accomplish great things by moving them, but it has certainly left a hole in my heart as I will deeply miss their daily fellowship here. As I have thought about their move, it caused me to reflect on God's providence in bringing us together as friends. Never have I known friends who were so willing to sacrifice the comfort of friendship in order to tell me the truth about myself. There were many times when these friends cared more for my soul than for our social relationship. They were willing to risk our friendship to help me be sanctified in Christ. It is because of their devotion to see my salvation worked out in purity that we remain such great friends. God graciously chose to preserve our friendship through humility and mutual edification. I pray these are the kinds of friends provided to my other brothers and sisters in Christ. Here are some fun photos from our last couple of days together.

Sweet family time...

I came to my sister's last week to help her with her new baby, Roran. She already has a 16-month old girl, Adaline, so her hands are really full right now. It has been such a joy to spend each day loving and caring for the babies. Roran is a really laid back little boy and it doesn't take much to please him. God has certainly blessed my sister and her husband with two absolutely beautiful children. I am so thankful that He providentially allowed me to spend these ten days with them. Here are some of my favorite moments so far...including a fun photo of the rental car I got when my connecting flight was cancelled. I had to drive from New Jersey to my sister's and told the rental company to give me the cheapest economy car they had...this is what I got!!!

My new nephew, Roran

Well I finally made it to my sister's house last night after a long travel day. But here are some first pics of baby Rory. He is so precious! I will post more as the week progresses.

Central Asia

I just returned from a trip to Central Asia with group from my church. It was an amazing, challenging and fulfilling two weeks! I am including a couple pictures (out of my 600)...maybe I can post more later. The Lord truly blessed our time there as we developed relationships with children and women in a poor area of the city where there is no established Christian witness. In a land dominated by the Islamic faith (99.9% of the population), I was very humbled as we worked with a family who has sacrificed all material security to go and live amongst the people in this community. They are investing their lives in the spiritual welfare of the people there, trusting the Lord to carry out a fruitful work. I praise God for their faithfulness and give Him the glory for leading us on this trip.